question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Text me some of your sweat
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