Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
