I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize