please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
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