i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
