ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
