At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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