Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
