Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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