Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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