I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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