I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
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