somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
