Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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