good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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