you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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