Christians are straight up FREAKS
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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