I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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