Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
