it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
