we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
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She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
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You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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