You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
