Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
