I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize