I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
