Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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