i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.