you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
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I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
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We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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