I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
