So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
