i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Randomize
