you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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