Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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