so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
