anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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