nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Randomize
