Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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