Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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