Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
