I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize