Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Randomize