My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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