So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
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The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
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I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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