Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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