New invention idea: vibrating tampons
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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