The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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