Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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