evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
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