i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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