There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
